About fawN

May 10, 2004 -

It's taken me more than 2 months to finally decide to start working on my pages again! I'll start with...


Games: Neopets, Animal Crossing, The Sims/The Sims2, Starcraft, Age of Empires I & II, Unreal Tournament

Color: Purple (least favorite Orange)

Restaurant: India Palace (saag paneer!)

Car: Dodge Viper (although I don't like this year's model!)

Actor (for looks): Vin Diesel

Actors (for acting): Mel Gibson, Johnny Depp, Sylvester Stallone, Arnold Szwartzenegger, Tom Hanks

Actresses: Julia Roberts, Sandra Bullock

Authors: Sylvia Browne, James Van Praagh, J.K. Rowling

Bands: Type O Negative, Evanescence, Tatu, Bush, Seether, Breaking Benjamin, Linkin Park

Male vocalist (both for looks and voice!): Peter Steele (Type O Negative)

Hmm.. now more about me. (Ages updated 9-8-05.) I'm 28 years old, born in the Year of the Snake (wisdom), and I'm a Leo, although Leo's are supposed to be outgoing leaders, and that's SOOOO not me. I spend most of my time on the computer, playing Neopets and talking to fellow adult guild members. I also have a 4 year old daughter who is much of a distraction, and a 31 year old husband of 8 years who is the sole computer tech for 11 of our city's radio stations.

I also like reading, and my favorite topic of interest is spirituality, namely life after death, the purpose of life, and communication with spirit through meditation, lucid dreaming, and such things. I used to draw/paint/sculpt, which is fun and I'd like to do more of, but not right now because I don't have the workspace or the time without a toddler clambering all over my lap. I also like to write, but I haven't been inspired, and I'm still frustrated from the effects of a serious car accident head injury which has left me feeling clouded over and hazy like life isn't real for the past 10 years. I feel like I have a veil pulled over my eyes, or a heavy warm blanket laid over my head. And I'm sick of going to doctors/therapists to try to help it or any of my other afflictions.

See, this is why I put off writing my pages again.. because I'm depressed and was afraid I'd get bitter and cynical. Part of my steps forward and out of this depression again (hopefully) are to talk to friends and family, and to start journalizing again, and to write down my thoughts even if I feel like they're incorrect interpretations of what's going on in my head, and not clam up like I'm used to doing. So, that's why I'm doing my web pages again.

May 11, 2004

Quirks about me: My best quality, I think, is my intellect. I'm good at any subject I try, and I've always had a 4.0+ in every stage of schooling. I'm thankful for my genetics, as my dad is a nuclear physicist and college calculus professor, and my mom is a retired computer programmer. I grew up in a brainy, nerdy, conehead town full of brainy nerdy people. So there was a lot of competition with other smart students in school, yet I managed to be somewhere in the top 8 students (they wouldn't tell us our exact placement) without really trying hard. College has been a LOT easier than my high school AP classes, and I've always managed to get the highest grade in the class. Yeah, it sounds like bragging, but I'm trying to convince myself I deserve a little bragging after all the low self-esteem I've had.

I feel plain, but others tell me I'm beautiful. I'm half-Chinese, but people often can't tell by looking at me, although some can, and it always surprises me. When I was little, I wanted to be less Chinese, because it was different, and I wanted to be like everybody else, and nobody could pronounce my middle name. But in high school and after, I became proud of my Asian heritage, and now I wish I looked MORE Chinese!

I'm a sucker for colors. I love eye candy, and bright visual displays. My webpages (and neopets shops) tend to be too colorful for other people, so I've been trying to tone it down and be gentler on their eyes. I LOVE colors and images and pretty visual arrangements, though, and I collect images and spend hours renaming them and organizing them into catagories. I guess that's where my left and right brain collide! Maybe possible careers that could spring off of this could be web design, interior design, landscaping, or painting. And I must add that I definitely dream in color, every night, so to those "professionals" out there who say people only dream in black and white, maybe YOU do, but I don't! The color in my dreams is more vivid than in real life!

I also collect various toys that I find visually pleasing, such as Beanie Babies, Neopets plushies, Princess of the World Barbies, Enchanted World of Faerie Barbies, and lots of other cute/pretty things. I love seeing patterned cloth in the fabric section, especially the really colorful or cute stuff.

My sense of fashion is more than my family of origin, but less than most girls, like my sisters in law. I dress for comfort, yet I also care what I look like. My most common casual outfit is my black capris I bought in Malaysia and my dressy black (yet comfy) sandals with a variety of tops. Yet I also have two other genres of fashion that I feel comfortable in. One is my Hot Topic clothes consisting of the baggy black pants with chains/straps/zippers all over it, worn with my big black combat boots and a tight tee. The other is my long crinkle skirts and long flowy dresses from Himalayan Rags & Riches. They are so comfortable and feminine, and one of them in particular feels very medieval to me. But unlike my sisters in law, I never wear makeup, and I don't enjoy shopping for clothes or browsing catalogues. If I go in the mall, it's to look for something specific, which is usually Beanie Babies or Neopets Plushies. ;)

fawN's casual look fawN's goth look fawN's dressy look
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