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My Vacation of '99


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Hello. Let me tell you a story. It began on a freezing winter night 15 years ago in Manchester. There a hideous mutation born and produced from toxic waste so disclosed that not even the government, who put it there in the first place, remembered it now. This freak of nature emerged to terrorize the population. In the beginning, people could only manange a fleeting glance at the beast but was the days wore on, it became obvious that it's natural fear of man was disappearing. At first local authorities refused to admit that such a thing was possible, believing that numerous 'eye-witnesses' were either lying or crazy. But then the killing started.

God. I can't believe I actually wrote all of that. Must be one of those stupid days caused by suffering from too much boredom. Yippee - I feel so immature. Okay - about me. My name is Sam, I'm 15 and I come from Malaysia - which incidentally is better than Norway (though I have never been to Scandinavia, I have to put that down because it is possibly 'a thing I do'). I wear contact lenses which I have no use for because I always seem to smash my right leg (parents want me that have a broken leg - it's true!) just before SAISA soccer. That's South Asia Inter School Association, but SAISA is so much easier to say (by the way, I had to look that up somewhere because no one can remember what the abbreviation stands for). So...I've lived in Sri Lanka for 11 years this May '99. I'll possibly spend Y2K here, but that's pretty okay because I wouldn't want to fly. But 11 years here does affect your mentality a bit - as relating to this page, you've obvious come to a very very mature and deep site, full of intellectual thoughts and the beginning of a Yale graduate (actually, I think America sucks and I'm going to the UK for my education but Yale is so much easier to write than Oxford or Cambridge). I'll also try not to stray away from the subject too much as things like Sri Lanka and the intelligent opinions are covered somewhere else on this 'site'. I have one really -painful- sister, but that's expected so I don't really care. And two dogs! Samantha, the white one, and Budweiser, obviously the brown, (ie. Sam and Buddy - but don't get any ideas).

Anyways...things I like - I like food (chocolate, ice cream, Malaysian, basically everything except mushrooms). I like tomato juice with plenty of salt and sauce, no pepper, stirred violently until this red has turned into brown or black depending on the sauce. I like dogs, cats and small mice, hamsters. And dwarf hamsters (soooooo cute you wouldn't believe but they wouldn't have allowed it in the airplane). I like girls, but they don't like me - which is bad in most respects :). I like music (rap isn't music). Greenday, Everclear and more recently Sugar Ray are very good. Offspring are okay but they are unsingalongable. I like the radio. I like playing the guitar, stringing feebly-held chords together and hoping like crazy it sounds okay - but I usually play the guitar for me so I don't give a damn about what you think. I like swearing at my computer for improved performance. I like swearing in general at stupid American people who don't know where Sri Lanka is. In case you didn't know, Sri Lanka is an island below Rhode Island in the United States of America and it will be the 51rst state on 1rst January 2000. If you don't believe me, look it up on a map - good luck :). I like listening to the french language for some strange reason - that's probably thanks to Vaihere (another issue too delicate to discuss here ohmigod) - who can speak it so fast I can't catch anything except the last word - deucement.

I like standing in front of huge disco speakers and letting the base try to push you over. I like the Faculty - the movie of course. It's a very very good movie and it has a naked girl at the end of it - which is unusual because most films have a naked women at the start...at least, most films I've seen....yeyyyyayayahiiihi. I like using a huge container as a glass and filling it up with ice cubes and cold water then snuggling up on a sofa with a good book and reading it until the day is over. I like looking at people's rings/necklaces and other ornaments because they tell more about that person and his or hers likes and dislikes than you could ever get out from them. I like romantic comedies the most out of all the film genres. The two main characters in them always rely on extraordinary luck in the final scene - complete with 'the talk' of course. I like cartoons that are -funny-. Hercules is good. So is I Am Weasel (I love it when that baboon sticks the lipstick in his nostril). Powerpuff Girls I like. But the best has to be GOJILLA. GOJILLA! Nigel always gets crushed and it's so damn funny. Mfffffffff - I almost forgot - South Park. Kickass man. The movie really rocks too..."Ouch." "Oh yeah, you like there don't you? Bitch." I like lighting things on fire, preferably with a match because I hate cigarette lighters...which brings me on my next subject...stuff I dislike (duh).

I hate racists. I can't stand the stares, I can't stand the 'looks' and most of all, the attidude really gets me. This applies to those 'nigger' haters too because race is something nobody can control. Therefore the 'One Nation' party in Australia sucks too. I agree with the fact that some people are smarter than others, but no race is made greater. For that matter, it's a known fact that the highest math scores are recorded anually around the Japan/Korea region :)

I dislike mushrooms except when their finely chopped up and in soup or spaghetti (more on that on my Views/Opinions page over on your left). I don't like Popeye, Two Stupid Dogs and most of all I don't like Tom and Jerry. I don't like looking at naked men (yes, incase it's hard to get through, I'm not gay). I don't like the feeling I get when someone says 'Lisa' not that it's a bad thing or anything, but I'm very embarrassed about the whole issue and I wish I could find her again and say that I was really pathetic. I don't like being pathetic. I don't like ultra-small toe nails that are painted blue so that you can see their non-existent size half a meter away. I don't like the smell of sweat. I don't like sweating (but I do...a lot). I don't like Arnav because he's such a fruit. I don't like anything in coconut flavour because it doesn't at taste like the real thing at all. I don't like papayas. I don't like coursework (I don't have any! I rule at selecting subjects!). I don't like science fairs (they are over at last, may you never implement your idea Mr. Smith). I don't like when people expect you to take in their dishes just because they've never taken them in before in their life. I don't like it when people serve whites before me. I hate it when people state that I shave my legs (hmmmmm, no more on this subject).

Thanks for actually squinting here.
Special thanks to Sher, for without her, AHoT could never be and I'm sorry for that night.
This small space is not enough to thank everyone.
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