The compendium of technogeek jokes

1)Who was the first computer expert? Eve,she had an Apple in one hand,and a WANG in the other.
2)What is the technogeek definition of virginity? a big issue over a litle tissue.
3)What is a technogeek's favorite food? Fiche and chips.
4)Why does a true female technogeek never have sex with Bill gates? Technogeeks don't do windows.
5)How many technogeek programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None-It's a hardware problem. or:NONE-We'll document in the manual
6)How many hardware technogeeks does it take to change a light bulb? None-fix it in the software.
7)Why are technogeeks in the dark? There's noone to change a lightbulb.
8)How many technogeeks does it take to seduce a girl? Four.One to check out the software,one to manage the firmware,one who has the hardware,and a lurker to monitor the connection.
9)What is the definition of a impotent technogeek? One who can't get his floppy into the slot.
10)What does a technogeek have for breakfast? Java and a toasted hard drive.
11)Knock Knock,who's there?UNIX,UNIX WHO? Unix my posts,I nix yours.
12)Technogeek pick-up lines: *Boy,you're as pretty as my Pentium *You sure boot up my firmware *Wanna come over to my house and run a few routines? *I think that you are quite compatible on my hardware.
13)What part of the female anatomy does a technogeek like the most? Breasts-they are binary.
14)Knock Knock,Who's there?ASCII.Ascii who? Ascii no questions,and i'll tell no lies.
15)Why don't technogeeks ever stay in jail? They have their own escape key.
16)How do you know if a technogeek has broken into your house? Your computer is fixed,your homework is done,and your snacks are all gone.
17)What do you call a technogeek condom? Shrinkwrap Antivirus.
18)What do you call a burst technogeek condom? General Protection Fault
19)What does a technogeek say when he gets his girlfriend pregnant? General Protection error.
20)What is the Abortion Clinic called at Technogeek General Hospital? Abort,Cancel,Retry?
21)What are the 3 food groups of Technogeeks? Fast,Frozen and Fried.
22)What does a technogeek call a prostitute? Shareware.
23)Who was the 1st technogeek? Adam,when Eve gave him an APPLE.
24)Why was Lawrence of Arabia considered a technogeek? He had a hard drive in the desert.
25)What does a technogeek do after a night of drinking? FTP,(hefty pee)
26)When does a technogeek lose his virginity? When he gets his 1st computer.
27)What do you call it when a technogeek meets his mate over the internet? Love at first BYTE.
28)What is the technogeek definition of an ideal woman? 30 sec. after orgasm,she turns into yr computer,a 6-pack and a pizza.
29)Why do technogeeks have the last laugh? They now rule the world.
30)How do you drive a technogeek crazy? Tell him your mouse can run a maze.
31)How does a technogeek define total breakdown? When all of the electronic devices strapped to his body quit working.
32)What did the technogeek say when he saw a pretty waitress? "How do I get access to that server?
33)What does a technogeek call an erection? A log-on
34)How does a technogeek refer to constipation? Anal torque.
35)Why don't technogeeks go to proctologists? When you have a pain in the ass,the last person you want to go to is a know it all pain in the ass.
36)When does a technogeek think that he has the ultimate connection with a girl?When the date rate exceeds 28.8

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