Ok, I have the time and am bored, so here goes:
My relationship with Ian began when he kicked me for the first time. He did that quite often, actually. But I didn't mind at the time; it didn't hurt that much. But he did become an intense pain after a while, especially on May 31, 1983.
Ian has always been precocious. His dad said he got his brains from him, which explains why his dad doesn't have any.
Ian has always been a hit with the girls, especially his sisters. In fact, he hit them a lot. But they always hit back, so I guess that's ok.
I used to tease Ian that if he didn't do better in school, he'd have a career flipping burgers. I guess I must've been psychic because he has worked at Burger King for three years now. But he's a boss, so I guess that's pretty good. (What do I know? I work for the sewer department, which means I take a lot of crap (for $25 - $30 per month).)
Anyway, Ian has turned out to be pretty good overall. We get along great, since he moved out on his own. I am taking applications for wife for him; send all responses to: email@example.com.
Love ya, Ian:).