WELL MET BY MOONLIGHT

Title: WELL MET BY MOONLIGHT, 1/1
Author: Jaye (Copyright December 2002)
Codes: VOY C/P PG-13

Disclaimer: Star Trek and all related characters and concepts are the property 
of Paramount. No infringement is intended or profit made. This is PG-13 for the 
suggestion of m/m sex. If you're not interested (or not old enough), don't read 
it. 

Archive: Drop me a note first so I know where it's going. Please keep the text 
(especially the disclaimer) intact.

Feedback: Sure but be kind, or at least constructive. E-mail is 
readr8901@fastmail.fm

Summary: A nighttime conversation is the aftermath of a pool game with most 
unusual stakes.

Note: AU (No P/T). Originally written for the 2002 "Die J/C Die" Contest.

***************

It was a cool, clear night, but that wasn't the reason Tom was trembling. He let 
out a gasp as the holodeck doors slid shut behind him and disappeared.

He was on a mesa just after moonrise. Long shadows sliced the silver-white light 
along the rocks, the contrast slashing razor-sharp. Earth's stars burned against 
the velvet black of the sky, and he took the silence inside himself with every 
breath. Body and mind calmed, courage gathered, and he stepped forward.

The crunch and skittering of small stones dislodged by his steps announced his 
arrival to the man sitting cross-legged at the edge of the cliff. Tom stopped 
beside him and stared out, his eyes drawn to the line of scrub and sandstone 
that marked the place where earth gave way to air.

"It's over then." Chakotay's soft voice made it a statement, not a question.

"Yes," Tom replied. When no comment was forthcoming he admitted, "I won."

"You wouldn't be here otherwise."

Nervousness twisted Tom's fingers into the material of his slacks. He turned to 
look at Chakotay, a statue of imperturbable calm. The moonlight bleached his 
face to an eerie gray, plunged his eyes into pools of darkness. The strong 
profile bespoke Chakotay's claim to this ancient place, his connection to it.

Tom shivered, wanting to reach out and touch Chakotay, to prove the older man 
was flesh and blood and not some specter from the days when the river carved 
this canyon through rock and soil.

Honestly, he just wanted to touch him.

The need was as familiar to Tom as the constellations sparkling above their 
heads, and stirred his soul more profoundly than his yearning to see the planet 
of his birth.

The shadows on Chakotay's face deepened as he sighed. "I never seem to learn my 
lesson. I worked with you in the Maquis, and you agreed to help Voyager capture 
my people. I tried to forget the past and see you for the person you became here 
in the Delta, and you undermined my authority and taunted me without remorse. I 
put aside my anger at the Jonas ruse and became your friend, and you 
deliberately humiliated me in front of everyone." His low laugh had no humor in 
it. "I must be the most stupid person in the universe to keep trusting you."

Tom's fingers stilled, clenched. He sank to his knees, his face reflecting 
dismay. "No, Chakotay, don't say that. Please, just let me explain."

"How can you possibly justify twisting my confidences into that stunt you pulled 
tonight?" Anger and hurt brought Chakotay to life as he finally shifted to meet 
Tom's eyes.

"I didn't plan it, I swear. It just happened." Anxiety and guilt sharpened Tom's 
voice.

"It just *happened*? Spirits preserve me if you ever decide you *want* to do me 
harm." Chakotay snorted in disgust and surged to his feet. He swiftly strode 
away from the kneeling figure, following the edge of the cliff.

Tom scrambled to his feet and gave chase. In a dozen strides he caught the other 
man's arm. Contact at last. Tom yanked him to a halt with desperate strength. 
"Will you just *listen* for a minute?"

His heart sank as Chakotay shrugged out of Tom's grip and moved away a step or 
two. But then Chakotay paused almost reluctantly, arms crossing. "So talk," he 
growled.

Surprised at the sudden capitulation, Tom struggled with what to say. He ran a 
hand through his hair, considering. Then, breathing deeply once more, he said, 
"I couldn't stand it any more."

"What?" Even in the less than perfect light Chakotay's confusion was apparent.

"I have to start from the beginning." A grunt of frustration accompanied Tom's 
pacing, the calm gleaned from the moonlit night forgotten. "You're a very 
private person, Chakotay. In the Maquis I remember people calling you the 
'Mystic Warrior'. Always full of mystery, and strength, and purpose. Shit, you 
were the hottest thing I'd ever seen, all can-do attitude and sexy leather."

The black hole of Chakotay's mouth hung open a moment, then closed with a click.

Tom waited another moment before he continued. "It was more than physical 
attraction though. I wanted to *know* you, be with you, find out who lives 
behind those wise eyes. And I wanted to let you discover me." Tom's smile of 
reminiscence was tinged with regret. "But I didn't interest you beyond my 
piloting skills. It's not surprising, really. A dedicated fighter would hardly 
waste time with a mercenary."

Chakotay's murmured, "Or maybe you were a little too interesting. A distraction 
at the wrong place, the wrong time."

The quiet admission stopped Tom in his tracks. He pivoted to face Chakotay fully 
and tried to keep the hope out of his expression. "Then I was captured and 
figured I'd never see you again. But I couldn't forget. When Captain Janeway 
offered to get me out of prison, all I could think was that it wasn't too late. 
That I'd give her the slip, steal a shuttle. Find you again. Get a second 
chance."

"A second chance to annoy the hell out of me?"

The hint of humor shading the question quirked Tom's lips when he heard it. But 
then the smile faded. "A second chance to be more to you than just an annoyance. 
To know the private man, the thoughts behind the stoic façade. But for the 
longest time you wouldn't open up to me, Chakotay."

"And just when I started to let you in, the spy plot was hatched." Chakotay's 
arms had shifted from crossing in protection to unconsciously hugging himself.

Tom wondered if Chakotay was reacting to the memories of confusion and hurt. 
Stars knew twinges of guilt still pained *him* when he recalled those days. 
"Yes. And like the good soldier I'd become, I obeyed orders." Tom hesitantly 
took a step closer, trying to reach out with his voice and eyes. "My obligation 
to the captain, to Voyager, was so strong because I wanted you to respect me. So 
I fulfilled my duty."

Dimples flashed brief patches of shadow as Chakotay conceded Tom's point with a 
half-smile. "I doubt the order to antagonize me was so onerous a burden. You 
seemed to relish the role of arrogant SOB."

"Do you want to know how I really felt?" Tom risked another step. "Scared. 
Terrified. Because I knew if I failed I was dead. And if I succeeded, there was 
a good chance you'd never let yourself trust me again. Not one on one, man to 
man."

"I almost didn't." Chakotay drifted across the tableland to where another cliff 
face rose behind them. He leaned against it, tilting his head back against the 
rock.

"What changed your mind?" A bit of Tom's anxiety receded before the rise of 
curiosity.

"Damned if I know. It's not like you were falling over yourself to make amends." 
Chakotay's brow furrowed as he considered. His answer arrived slowly, as if he 
were evaluating each word before releasing it to the night. "I think I needed to 
be certain what to label you, friend or foe. I couldn't figure you out. By all 
appearances you were an unrepentant mercenary, turning coat as easily as 
changing shirts."

Those ageless dark eyes looked at Tom then, and he felt helpless in their grip. 
He barely heard the husky tones for the blood pounding in his ears as Chakotay 
confided, "But my gut kept telling me it was a front. That you had just been 
waiting for someone to *ask* for your loyalty, not bargain for it. Maybe even to 
prove to you that they deserved it."

Chakotay looked out over the canyon once more. "For my own peace of mind I 
needed to see your true colors. And the only way I could come up with to earn 
your trust was to offer my own."

"And so you did." Tom's thoughts warmed with the memories of how their 
friendship grew, step by cautious step. The occasional pool game, swapping 
childhood stories here, sharing secrets there. "And I know what a rare thing 
that is, Chakotay. Your walls are as high as mine." He shook his head ruefully. 
"But no one ever notices. I suppose it's your style. I shout at people from the 
top of my battlements, keeping everyone at bay. You invite them for tea on the 
front lawn, all nice and proper, and they never notice that you've kept them out 
just as effectively."

Tom approached. "But you let *me* in, revealed the private man. Strong, but 
sometimes uncertain. Proud of your heritage, but surprisingly humble about your 
own achievements. Stubborn but willing to admit your mistakes. Optimistic, but 
with a wry sense of irony." He stood before Chakotay. "Warm and generous and 
caring, but afraid."

His shadow engulfed Chakotay, hiding him from the moonlight. But they were so 
close now that Tom could see the reaction to his words wash through Chakotay's 
expression. But then the full mouth thinned and the firm jaw clenched as 
Chakotay's face closed. He pushed past Tom. Arms akimbo, he planted himself at 
the cliff's edge. "Afraid? That's absurd."

Tom swung around but stayed where he was. "Is it? You haven't really been 
involved with anyone since Seska, and that was over before we ever ended up out 
here."

"So? Neither have you."

The reason why almost escaped Tom's hastily clamped lips. After a breath to 
regain his composure Tom said lightly, "True, but *I'm* not the poster boy for 
intense emotion and soulful commitment. You know, still waters and all."

"And so you decided that tonight you'd make some waves, stir things up to see 
what would happen?" Chakotay's icy tone banished their rapport. "It seems when 
it comes to you my fears were justified."

Tom shivered once more. He could sense Chakotay's tension. The man was ready to 
bolt. He was so close to losing Chakotay---in more ways than one. "I just...I 
told you, Chakotay, I couldn't stand it anymore." He unconsciously moved to 
block the path back to the holodeck doors. "The more I came to know you, the 
more I hated to see you alone. That wonderful heart just going to waste."

He looked out again, across the silent canyon, then back to meet dark eyes 
flecked with moonlight. "Waiting for a woman who will never accept you into her 
life."

Again, a humorless laugh rang forth. "Well, you've certainly proven *that* 
beyond the shadow of a doubt." But then Chakotay sobered. "Did you ever stop to 
consider that I might have preferred the status quo?"

"Of course you did." Tom shrugged. "Every time you've reached out to someone 
you've been hurt for your trouble. It's natural to be afraid. Anyone would be 
hesitant to offer their heart again."

"I was content with things the way they were." A hint of anger, or was it 
desperation, edged Chakotay's words. "With my life, my friendships. With the 
chance for love...someday."

"That 'someday' was never going to arrive." With a burst of energy Tom was in 
front of Chakotay, grabbing his shoulders. "And you knew it. But it gave the 
appearance of involvement, so you were safe from having to risk your heart with 
anyone else. But you were hanging on out of your sense of duty, not desire." 
Tom's fingers tightened. "You told me yourself, you didn't feel you could move 
on while things between you and Kathryn were still unresolved."

Dark hands threw off pale ones. "Thanks to you, that's no longer the case. 
Kathryn has---what was the phrase?---relinquished all claim to my affections." 
Chakotay spun away from Tom, staring out into the night. His shoulders 
tightened. "It's a cruel thing you've done, Tom, to turn what I confided in you 
into a game like that."

The words burst from Tom unbidden. "She doesn't deserve you."

Chakotay shot him a startled glance at the sudden non sequitur, then resumed his 
contemplation of the canyon.

Tom insisted,"Kathryn should have cleaved to you---or set you free---years ago. 
Not kept you both in limbo." Tom took a deep breath, took a chance, took the 
plunge. He moved up behind Chakotay, embracing him from behind, resting his chin 
on a broad shoulder, brushing their cheeks together. His voice dropped. "I 
didn't mean to hurt you, Chakotay, I swear it. I just...you were like Sleeping 
Beauty, locked away from life. I wanted to wake you up, open your eyes 
to...love."

They stood, silently. When Chakotay spoke his voice was hushed, almost dreamy. 
"Have you ever noticed that the moon looks so close at rising? As if you only 
had to stretch your fingers far enough and it would be yours."

Tom didn't move, didn't breathe, until he felt the body in his arms relax into 
the embrace. Hands rose to cover his and he shuddered with the release of the 
tension that had gripped him all evening. He cast his eyes to Earth's solitary 
satellite, now high above them. "But that's just an illusion," he said.

"Yes," Chakotay conceded. "The truth is that the moon is beautiful, but cold and 
lonely. And forever out of reach." He paused. "But no one tries to stop a man 
from the quest for her, or ask him why he's wasting his life on such a hopeless 
cause." The older man sighed. "You're right, Tom. I am afraid. Of you."

He turned around and Tom started trembling again. But this time with awe at the 
emotion in the face before him. Chakotay's whisper seemed to travel right to his 
core. "You say I let you inside my walls. But the reverse is also true. Or 
perhaps you lowered the drawbridge." A small smile waxed and waned. "However you 
want to describe it. But I saw you: brave and reckless, forgiving and steadfast, 
sarcastic and cynical on the surface, so vulnerable and hopeful underneath."

A hand rose to cup Tom's face. It was a shocking brand of heat in the cool air, 
and Tom leaned into the caress instinctively. He kept his eyes open, locked with 
Chakotay's, wondering if his own soul, his love, his need were just as naked 
upon his face. In this moment, he was no longer afraid.

Chakotay swallowed and continued, his voice husky. "I sensed the essence of Tom 
Paris. And I was terrified to realize I'd lost the whole of my heart to you."

Tom closed his eyes and pressed his forehead to Chakotay's. "So you panicked 
that I'd figured out your secret when I started dropping hints that it was time 
for you to forget Kathryn and move on."

The other man nodded. "And told you I still felt a sense of obligation to her." 
Chakotay's rueful chuckle---so different from his earlier non-laughs---warmed 
Tom down to his toes. Chakotay admitted, "Sleeping Beauty wasn't quite as 
clueless as you thought."

His hand slipped from Tom's face to trail down to his waist. They stood pressed 
together in the moonlight, arms wrapped around each other, letting the 
connection between them grow. At peace.

Tom was lost in a daze of happiness and anticipation when a sharp pinch on his 
posterior startled him back to reality with a yelp. "What the hell was that 
for?"

Chakotay drew back to say, "Sleeping Beauty is supposed to be awakened with a 
gentle kiss, not a bucket of cold water in the face." He shook his head and 
asked, "What the hell possessed you to challenge Kathryn that way?"

A sudden flush of embarrassment set Tom's face burning. He hid in the crook of 
Chakotay's neck, kissing the strong column, and mumbled, "I didn't exactly plan 
it. The Captain invited me for a game of pool and I asked her what we were 
playing for. You walked into Sandrine's, so damn sexy and handsome and shit I 
wanted to kiss you right then and there. But you were off-limits since I knew 
you felt Kathryn still had a claim on you."

He lifted his head with a sheepish grin. "When she told me to set the stakes I 
couldn't resist. I *had* to make you see that you were free."

Chakotay said seriously, "What *I* saw was that my friend had reverted to 
typical Flyboy form and made me the butt of the most hurtful joke I could 
imagine. That I was just another thing to bet on, like a week's worth of 
rations. I was humiliated in front of half the crew. You really hurt my 
feelings, Tom."

Tom's regret must have been obvious, because Chakotay forgave him with a smile 
and admitted, "But I'm glad you won."

The memory of the fierce competition and relief at his victory tightened Tom's 
arms around Chakotay's waist. "Me, too. She wouldn't budge a millimeter. I 
thought I was a goner more than once." Tom cupped the back of Chakotay's head, 
feeling the short dark strands tickle his fingertips. "On the one hand I wished 
you could see how hard we were fighting over you, but on the other I was 
relieved beyond words you'd already walked out. I didn't want to see your 
disappointment when Kathryn finally lost."

Lingering uncertainty made Tom search his partner's face as he said, "She's 
given up her claim on you. Are you really okay with that?"

"Yes. I wasn't ready to admit it before now, but I love you, Tom. Even though 
I'm going to be teased for the rest of my days over how we got together." He 
arched an eyebrow. "You do realize paybacks are hell?"

Tom shifted, suddenly nervous. "Um, just what exactly do you have in mind?"

"Well," Chakotay drawled, letting his fingers roam the pert backside in his 
grip, "I figure I have to be as blatant and outrageous as you were, so I was 
thinking of taking you on that very same pool table some evening."

Tom couldn't believe how turned on he was by the mental image. He never realized 
he had an exhibitionist streak tucked away in his psyche.

Or maybe it was just that he knew Chakotay would never stake such a public claim 
if he wasn't fully committed to the relationship.

"That has definite possibilities." Tom knew he'd surprised his love with the 
casual response. He grinned. "But I have a few alternative suggestions." A 
wedding, for example, was a very public event.

Chakotay offered his own grin. "We'll discuss it. I'm sure you can be very 
persuasive." His smile faded as he stared at Tom. "I do love you, Tom Paris. You 
can trust that. Trust me."

"I know." Tom sobered as well. "And you should know I lost my heart to you a 
long time ago, Chakotay."

The moonglow shone on them like a benediction as they drew together for their 
first kiss. Soft lips found their mates, beginning a lifetime of blending, 
melding, joining.

Contact. At last.

Tom knew then that it didn't matter if this holodeck replica was the closest he 
ever came to seeing Earth again. He was in Chakotay's arms. He was home.

THE END